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Finally, I See You Crystal Clear

I remember getting ready to leave for this trip thinking, "Wow… three and a half months is practically an eternity away from home and everything familiar." I mean, sure, there was everybody telling me how it would be over before I knew it or telling me I would be having way too much fun to miss everybody back home. And, sure, I said some of those kinds of things to other people as well, but who really believes all that when they're getting ready to go live in Cambodia for the next three and a half months? I know I didn't. I remember thinking that was just something you said to your blubbering friend to get her to shut up for just a second… Yet, here I am, writing my last blog in Cambodia to you all. Where did this trip go?

As I sit here in in my bed, trying to write this, I am actually at a loss for words. How do you even begin to put into words the supernatural, wonderful, amazing changes God has put you through? All I know is that going itno this trip, I was a mess. I felt beaten down and broken. I never knew I could be truly loved or restored because of what I have done and the person I used to be. Now, just a short 3 1/2 months later, I leave this trip completely new in Christ and completely whole in His promises. He used my experiences and my teammates (pretty much my sisters by now) to show me what I had been blind to all this time… that God really does restore us. He doesn't care what sins we have done in the past, all He asks is that we come to Him, confess our sins, and follow Him the rest of our days. These women (and Seang, of course) live so full of God's love and grace and compassion, it's hard not to want the same thing. I will cherish these months and all the countless memories that go along with them.

Whether it was "hitting on" Kerina and Courtney (CoCo, she prefers to be called) or sitting in bed listening to Hailey give her opinions to the TV back at Spring Park or even "No-Shave-November" with Erin, these women I have had the privilage of being with 24/7 the past few months have truly made an impact on my time here, my life back home, and, most definitely, my future. I could never pinpoint the exact time my life started to lighten and change for the better, all I know is that it happened in our countless laugh fests and the countless hours getting poured into and then taking that and beginning to pour into others. These women are not just people I was stuck with in a foreign country, but, instead, best friends and sisters. We have a bond most people wish for their whole lives. In the words of Kerina (words spoken at least three or four times a week), "Dude, we lived in ASIA together!" Now, thas wassup, playa! 😉

"Since you are my rock and my fortress, for the sake of your name lead and guide me. Keep me free from the trap that is set for me, for you are my refuge. Into your hands I commit my spirit; deliver me, LORD, my faithful God." -Psalm 31:3-5

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